–– Paul Schlehlein

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Should more mothers participate in the workplace? Will mothers who seek careers enjoy more peace and fulfilment? According to an article by Stellenbosch Business School in South Africa, women are unrepresented in today’s workplace, and businesses throughout Africa face gender imbalance, essentially punishing mothers for “having children”. 

Legion are the articles written by African mommies trying to balance a career and children. One Nigerian career mother fired seven nannies in one year. Another mum from Uganda argued that children cared for by strangers are no worse off than those cared for by their mothers. What are we to make of this?

The biblical position teaches that a woman’s priority is the home. According to Titus 2:5, older, mature women must train the younger wives and mothers to be “working at home”, literally “keeping house”. This means her priority, not her place, is the home. If the womb is empty or the kids have grown and left the nest, it takes less hours to prioritise the home, whereas mothers with small children stay at home to love and nurture them. 

Feminism dominates today’s world and does not prize stay-at-home moms. Instead, it levels dozens of arguments urging mothers to seek careers outside the home even while their children are small. Christians must know how to answer such arguments with clarity and love. Here are just three. 

First is the Fulfilment Argument. In her article “Working Moms’ Secret”, Sarah Green Carmichael argues that working moms are mentally and physically healthier than stay-at-home moms. One of Carmichael’s errors is that she equates “working moms” with “career moms”. She implies stay-at-home moms don’t work, when in fact they often work the hardest. 

I agree that working moms find the most joy in life. This is because work was ordained by God as a means of fulfilment and praise to Him. Scripture says people must “devote themselves to good works” (Tit. 3:14). In Proverbs 31, the Virtuous Woman works in nearly every verse, both inside and outside the home. Her hands and feet never stop. 

So the debate is not if a woman should work but where. In the Christian worldview, a mother finds her most fulfilment by working in the home. This is how God created her. She is domestic by nature. 

This reminds me of the meme of a woman with an apron putting fresh bread into the oven. Sarcastically it states that women are slaves if they work at home but free if they work for strangers. The opposite is true. 

Second is the Breadwinner Argument. Carmichael writes: “Men are allowed to be proud of providing for their families; why not us?” The answer is that women are to provide for their families, just in different ways than men. God created men and women differently. God calls husbands to lead, provide and protect and he calls wives to keep the home, bear children and be helpers to their husbands. 

First Corinthians 11:8-9 says, “For man was not made from woman, but woman from man. Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man.” As one pastor put it, the man is called to tend the Garden and the woman is called to tend the man. This is why women from every age and culture consider men who can provide to be attractive, though vice versa is not true. 

Stay-at-home Dads are the new kids on the block. They watch the kiddos while moms build their careers. This is unnatural, dangerous to a marriage and deadly to a nation. This model will never build a strong society. 

Third is the Men Are Pigs Argument. This view advises girls to build their careers because one day their husbands will ditch them for another woman. With no career, she and the kids will belong to the poor house. 

Actually, Scripture promotes educated women. How else can they teach the children? In his book How Christianity Changed the World, George Schmidt argues that no ideology in world history advanced women’s education more than Christianity. My own wife is a Registered Nurse and was educated at some of America’s best medical schools—training she uses daily in the home. 

But it is folly to argue that the solution to unfaithful husbands is for mothers to spend less time in the home. These dead-beat husbands once were boys. They needed constant training and love at home from their mother, not daycare or supervision by their grandmother. As the morals of society wane, the solution is more time from the mother in the home, not less. 

Career moms are on the rise. What is the solution? First, husbands must improve by cherishing their wives and lauding the mothers of their children. Husband, work two jobs if you have to so that mom can stay home with the kids. God has made your shoulders square to carry this load. Praise her for her cooking, observe the clean house, have eyes only for one woman, seek a full quiver and bask in the atmosphere of a happy home. 

Second, women must reject the world’s feminist agenda. In fact, many women seek careers because working at home is too hard. It takes dying to self. No, moms can’t have it all. They cannot fully dedicate themselves both to their career and home. They cannot obey two masters. They cannot serve both God and mammon. 

Finally, Jesus Christ is the solution, as with all things. He gives new hearts and new desires and will change you from within if you ask.