Men go hunting where there’s game. They chase lions in the plains of the Serengeti, not the tundra of Alaska. They stalk moose in Canada, not the Sahara Desert. They search for wildebeest in the veld of South Africa, not the highways of London.

In the same way, young men must look for godly women where they can be found. Eliezer didn’t look for a godly woman in battle or a brothel, at sea, in a desert, or among pagans. Instead, he went to Mesopotamia, a country of likeminded people. And he visited a watering hole, a place where women often gathered (v. 11). 

Today, if a man spends all of his time in the workshop or a ball field or in front of video games, he won’t find a wife. The best place to find a godly wife is the local church. But this means he must actually attend there regularly and not just show up now and then. It also means he must attend a church with the kind of doctrine a godly girl would embrace. If the sermons are 15 minutes long, the pastor’s kids are rebels and the attitude of the congregation reflects the spirit of the age, he shouldn’t be surprised if the church pond is full of dead fish. Go where the Abigails, Marys, and Lydias are. 

Second, he should search for girls at other like-minded churches. After the disciples fished all night and found nothing, Jesus told them to cast their nets on the other side of the boat. There’s nothing wrong with young men checking out solid churches on the other side of town, in search of more than just good preaching. 

Universities and events that gather young people are other common places to find a wife. Online dating apps may at times be permissible, but one must be very cautious because these connections often emphasize secrecy and the superficial. Too many men are attached to screens and can easily trick (or be tricked) by girls online. Face-to-face relationships cultivated among other Christians are best because they encourage the input of pastors, parents, and godly friends (Rm. 15:14).

This lesson also implies that men must do the pursuing. Men are hunters and women are responders. Jesus (the groom) pursued the church (the bride). “We love him, because he first loved us” (1Jn. 4:19). Hosea ran after Gomer. Boaz pursued Ruth. The only women in Scripture that chase after men are prostitutes and unfaithful wives (Pr. 7:13).

Summary: Godly young men must get out of the house and go fishing where righteous fish can be found.