How Christians Should Date In Today’s World

Posted on May 21, 2026 by Paul Schlehlein

–– Matt Floreen

The audio version of this article is available here: YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

In today’s African dating scene, many single Christians find themselves caught between cultural expectations, modern pressures, and the timeless call to holiness. From Johannesburg to Lagos, the pursuit of love often feels more like navigating an overcrowded marketplace than building covenant relationships, as this recent article laments. The church has often lacked in providing biblical counsel on how to overcome the challenges. How should single Christians approach the issue of dating and finding a spouse?

Why are single Christians often confused about dating relationships? Here are three reasons:

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Marriage Procrastination: Eight Excuses for Staying Single

Posted on September 10, 2024 by Paul Schlehlein

–– Tim Cantrell

The audio version of this article is available here: YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

Currently, in South Africa, we have some 24 million singles, well over half of our adult population, and marriage statistics continue their rapid decline with more and more youth waiting longer and longer to get married, if ever. Top reasons South African singles give for delaying marriage are: “Desire for independence; self-esteem and relationship reluctance; economic and social reasons; past relationships and fear of commitment”. All four of these reasons have one thing in common: they are usually selfish excuses. It is no minor offence to reject God’s good institution of marriage, His wise creation ordinance that is the cornerstone of civilisation and the primary building block for all of society. As the view of marriage rises or falls, so does an entire nation.

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Our dating culture needs rescuing too!

Posted on July 23, 2024 by Paul Schlehlein

–– Malamulo Chindongo

The audio version of this article is available here: YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

Bible-believing Christians share a conviction about the primacy of marriage in God’s purposes. Sadly, such convictions are fading among many professing Christians. God gave us marriage as a gift; it is the very foundation of every society. Marriage lies at the core of every civilization. No group of people can flourish without healthy marriages. The Devil hates marriage, period—why? It is a unique relationship, a covenant between one man and one woman, existing solely for the glory of God. When done right, marriage brings many of God’s blessings to those who engage in it.

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May I Marry Any Christian?

Posted on May 28, 2024 by Paul Schlehlein

–– Tim Cantrell

Audio version of this article is available here: YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

A recent study showed that South Africa is one of only three countries in the world where religious involvement has increased in recent years, with over 85% of the country now claiming some kind of Christianity. But this raises the immediate question, “What kind of Christianity is it that is growing? What kind of gospel is being preached?” It also raises pastoral questions such as one I’m asked by young people:

“May I marry anyone who claims to be a Christian?”

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What Should a Couple Do If Their Parents Disapprove Their Marriage?

Posted on November 17, 2023 by Paul Schlehlein

– Paul Schlehlein

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When we consider a question like this, our first question should be: “Is this union honoring to God?” This is not the same question as: “Is this union honoring to my parents?” The two are often the same, but not always.

Here are five marks of forming a marriage that God approves.

(1) Conversion. Only a Christian may marry a Christian (2Cor. 6:14). God forbids inter-faith marriage (1Cor. 7:39), which only leads to heartache (Ex. 34:16).

(2) Consent. Forced marriage is not marriage. Adam left his parents to cleave to his wife, showing volition. He came to her, showing it was not by force (Gn. 2:24).

(3) Character. The bride and groom should share the same spiritual vibrancy. One may be more spiritually mature than the other but too great a divide will hamper the marriage. “Can two walk together except they be agreed” (Amos 3:3)?

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Dating Apps and the Christian

Posted on November 16, 2023 by Paul Schlehlein

–– Tim Cantrell

Listen and subscribe: Youtube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

Should Christians use dating apps? One study claims that 1 in 3 South Africans uses online dating and that only 11% do it to find a marriage partner, while 48% do it for fun, 41% to find friends, and 13% for sex. Our Police Minister Bheke Cele has recently warned of the increasing use of dating apps for kidnapping. Yet global revenue from dating apps for 2023 will add up to US$8.7 billion, from 441 million users – a colossal industry indeed! What does God’s Word say about this massive trend in our society?

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