No woman should ever be forced to marry a man. Genesis 2:24 says a man leaves his mother and father to marry his wife. A husband doesn’t drag the woman to his home. She comes happily, with a spring in her step.

As was the case with Rebekah, the parents should give their consent before the marriage. They said: “Behold, Rebekah is before you; take her and go, and let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has spoken.” The woman should also consent. Genesis 24:58 says: “And they called Rebekah and said to her, ‘Will you go with this man?’ She said, ‘I will go.’” 

To shoot straight means to tell the truth. A straight shooter gets to the point, no stories. After Eliezer met Rebekah’s parents, the family set a delicious spread before him. But before Eliezer could enjoy the tasty meal, he delivered an important message (Gen. 24:33-51). 

He clearly set out his purposes in coming. He told the whole truth and wasn’t deceptive with his plans. Isaac wasn’t interested in playing games. He wanted a wife and this was the purpose of the visit. 

Because women can easily be hurt, men must treat them with sensitivity. Young men have broken this rule innumerable times in every culture and in every era. It comes in four different forms.

There’s a difference between courting and dating. Courting is purposeful dating. Couples often date just for fun or pleasure, while the purpose of courting is to find a spouse. Courting also involves the parents, whereas dating is more independent.  

In Genesis 24, notice how often the parents are involved. From the start, Eliezer seeks them out. He quickly asks about her parents (v. 23) and she swiftly connects herself to her father (v. 24). Parents and siblings were involved from start to finish (vv. 28-50). On behalf of Abraham and Isaac, Eliezer asks permission from Rebekah’s parents to pursue her (v.49).

A young man with no money and no job is not ready to pursue a woman in marriage. But a man with work and cash in his pocket has earned the right to seek a bride. This is because one of the three central roles of a man is to provide. A husband “nourishes” his wife (Eph. 5:29), which includes putting food on the table. 

Eliezer proved Isaac was a man of means by giving Rebekah golden rings and bracelets (v. 22). Notice, this was not part of the bride price. Long before marriage was discussed, this jewelry served as an initial gift to show that Isaac’s team wasn’t working on the cheap. He had the means to provide for her.  

Usually, the first thing that attracts a man to a woman is her beauty. God made males to admire an attractive female—her angelic voice, the gentle curves of her body, and the softness of her touch. Moses acknowledged that the men of Israel would “see among the captives a beautiful woman” and then “desire to take her” for his wife (Dt 21:11).

Guys want women to be beautiful and women want to look beautiful. South Africa spends R10 million annually just on female hair products. The Bible usually speaks about a lady’s beauty in positive terms, presenting it as a blessing from God. Here are some examples: